Rattlesnake Jake: Snake with a gun
by SoaringSilverWing
Summary: This is the story of how Rattlesnake Jake killed the first sheriff. It's my tribute to the amazing snake! Rattlesnake Jake does NOT belong to me but this story does.


Hey everyone! This is a Rattlesnake Jake story of mine, which is basically the death of the first sheriff (before Rango). I've always loved Rattlesnake Jake as a character (ever since I saw the movie of course) and so I decide to write this as a tribute to him.

Please read and review! Hope you like it!

Snake with a gun.

"What'd you want John? Bloody drag me outta my snooze to get here"

"The new Sheriff is giving the people confidence. Too much confidence."

Rattlesnake Jake smirked, "You'll be sorry for his damned soul." The gun on his rattler clinked as he slithered out of the mayor's room. He moved across the paths of dirt, causing anyone in his way to quickly shuffle aside. Within hardly noticeable time, he reached the saloon. He could hear music playing inside and shook his head.

When he slammed open the door after putting a few bullets in it for good measure, he was met by stunned silence. Then a brown lizard stood up and said in a shaking voice, "Now, I don't need any trouble, if you would just-"

"Shut your damn mouth sheriff. I know why you're really here"

Jake could visibly see him shaking as he replied, "A-and why is th-"

"Save yourself the false bravery. These folks don't need a liar like you. All you want is the water, since you haven't got any. Isn't that right?"

He moved forward and spoke softly, "Yes." Rattlesnake Jake had no patience for cowards. He swung his tail gun and pointed it at the sheriff, "Now, I'll put some hard lead into that empty skull of yours if you don't make yourself heard you goddamn lizard!"

The trembling sheriff pulled at his collar, "Can we take this..outside?" Jake gave him a menacing chuckle, "Looks like you want to die son. I'll warn them friends in hell that you'll be coming." A few minutes later the snake and lizard were moving slowly tracking each other's movements. It was the terror-stricken lizard who tried to attack first, shooting multiple bullets at Jake's head which missed by a large margin.

The snake shook his head and pointed his gun at the lizard. Then from the nearby shattered house, Angelique came rushing out and called, "Wait! Please! Rattlesnake Jake, wait!"

"What the damn do you want woman?"

"Thank you. Sheriff, is it really true? That you were only here for the water?"

Clearly the sheriff saw that there was no point in denying it anymore, and Jake thought he was a smidge smart, not to plunge himself into deeper mud. "Yes, Angelique. That was my original intention, but now I want to protect you! All of this town!" Angelique clearly didn't want to believe this, "I cared about you! After this…..why should I believe you?!"

Rattlesnake Jake would've shot the lizard as soon as he met him but this was much more pleasing. "Angelique, I'm tellin' ya the truth", pleaded the lizard. "W-wait. Look up! Run!" Angelique screamed distressed. Jake tilted his head upwards and his eyes grew in fear, "Hawk!" He slammed himself against a building as fast as his coils would take him.

The hawk soared around for a few seconds before landing in front of the building. Jake squeezed his eyes shut and shot arbitrarily around him. Seconds later he ran out of bullets and mounting fear took over him. He opened his eyes slowly and saw the hawk flying off, screeching with pain. He noticed its wing was bleeding.

Relief took over him and then he noticed that the sheriff was nowhere to be seen. He quickly reloaded his gun. Jake entered the saloon and swung his head to glimpse its occupants, who shrank back in fear. Jake pointed his gun at the man nearest to him, "Where is the goddamned sheriff?!" He demanded to know.

The frog-like creature replied in a shaking voice, "We- don't really know. Please don't kill me. We just saw him run across into a building and then we don't know what happened. That's all!" Jake moved his head closer, "Which building exactly now?" "T-That one! Opposite of here!" The frog croaked out. Jake shook his head and left the place. When he entered the large building, he was met by a stone silence.

Jake flicked his tongue in and out, and his heat sensing pits picked up faint red from the far side of the building. He could hide himself but not his scent. Or blood. The rattlesnake moved silently through the building till he could sense the vibration just on the other side of a wall facing him. He reared back and let his gun rattle for a few seconds before pulling it back and taking multiple shots at the wall in front of him.

The cheap concrete was blown to bits and he could hear the gasping breath of the sheriff who stumbled backwards and ran for his life, taking the most complicated route possible to avoid the larger snake, but that wasn't working. Rattlesnake Jake was faster and more agile than the sheriff and within no time he overtook him.

"So, what's it going to be Sheriff? Any other pathetic escape schemes?"

"N-no. I'm fresh out. But I'm open to ideas."

"Good." And Jake shot him. Once in the head and the lizard was gone. The snake just smirked to himself and then slid around the body. When he got back to the main pathway of dirt, he found most of the citizens standing and eagerly waiting.

Jake jerked his head around swiftly to glare at them, "Now….you pathetic miscreants, if I ever see you messing around where you shouldn't be, your souls are mine!" The word 'mine' was said with a loud emphasis and a bearing of his impressive fangs. The townspeople just froze where they were, too shocked to reply.

Rattlesnake Jake decided to leave them there. He just swept out of the town into the vast Mojave Desert. And that was that, one more soul sent to hell's gates.


End file.
